So this is my first post in... About a month? Maybe longer.....
I'm really down in the dumps. Like you don't even know. So I'm going to explain something.
I have never felt love, nor have I felt loved. My mother was a crack-addict, so she was never truly a mother to me, and my dad is... I've explained my fatherly issues before.
I wasn't ever taught anything about love. My step-mom came in too late to try to teach me I guess. She tries, but it's a fruitless effort.
I hate myself for not being able to express the emotion "love" and because of it, I beleive love is a non-existent emotion. No one feels love. It's all lust or a highschool crush.
I've tried to feel loved from ppl, but whenever I tell them I love them, or send them a <3 in a good bye message, I get a simple "bye"...... No love in the message whatsoever.....
So why bother? Why bother with ANYTHING really.... Be better if I just disappeared and made everyones life just a little easier. I feel like I have no purpose in this life except to stay alive long enuff to realize I'm pointless.
So I want to thank all of you who read my blog, but I bid you farewell. This shall be my final blog post for at least 2 years. I'm sorry to any who were looking forward to my endless rants, or my valid arguments on real-life issues. This is Bi-Boy, signing out.
Things to remember: my half-brother and father are homophobes, my step-mom tries too hard, my three half-sisters are the nicest people on the planet, my biological mother Darla is a crack-addict, my "mom" Brittaknee is by far the greatest thing on the face of our universe, and contrary to popular belief I'm gay, not bi.
Thank you, and good night.
